
Mary is a member of my local writers group, Washington Romance Writers! She gave me a great review for Chesapeake Weddings on her blog! Stop by and check it out!
Author Archives: Cecelia Dowdy
Questions From A Writer
I’d originally shut down my blog for the second half of May to get a submission out the door. I’m still working on that submission, and I hope to have those sample chapters and synopsis out the door sometime in June. I am making progress, which is good, and I’m hoping this will turn into another book contract. Currently, I’m not under contract for anything, and I just found out that my book, Chesapeake Weddings, is out of print already! 🙁
It’s still available online and in a few stores, but, the publisher has discontinued the title and they told me that they’re out of stock, and, so far, they have no plans for printing more copies of Chesapeake Weddings.
Anyway, I received the following questions from Lashonda:
I write romance fiction novels and young adult novels. I love your blog by the way I would love to read some of your books.
I was wondering how did you get published?
How did you get your books published by so many different publishing companies?
I talk a little bit about my journey to publication here and here.
If you want to get published traditionally/commercially, then you need to join a writers’ organization. If you do romance, your best options would be American Christian Fiction Writers and Romance Writers of America. Once you join, interact with other writers at a writers conference. You can meet editors, agents, as well as mutli-published authors who’ll mix and mingle, and share loads of advice. You can also pitch your stories to editors and agents. That’s how I sold my first few books and I loved every minute of those conferences! 🙂
I want to be a traditional published author as well but I am worried about the rights to my work. Is there anyway I can be a published author and maintain all the rights to my writing?
About rights, I’m not lawyer, so, take the following advice with a grain of salt, but, when you traditionally publish, the copyright of the work is made in your name by the publisher. They register the copyright once they acquire your work for publication with the Library of Congress. If you look in most traditionally-published books, on one of the front pages – before the story begins, you’ll see the copyright symbol and then the author’s name and then the year. The publisher is simply “borrowing” your work for a specified period of time. For example, if you sell a book to Doubleday, you can’t turn around and self-publish that book yourself on the side – that would be unethical. The publisher has the rights to publish your book and pay you a percentage in royalties for each copy sold. Royalty percentages vary and I believe that they usually range anywhere between 8%-15%? That’s a question, so don’t quote me on that. I think the percentage is higher for hardcover novels. Also, if your book is picked up for bookclub distribution, the royalties are sometimes lower on the bookclub sales. It all depends upon the contract.
The rights to your work will usually revert back to you some years after the book has gone out of print. You’d need to read your contract to see how long that would be. Usually, once that time span has passed, and you want the rights back, you need to contact the publisher and tell them that you want the rights back to your work. You can then do what you want – self-publish it on your own, maybe do an e-book, maybe see if another publisher will acquire it and re-release it….I’m not sure what most authors do once they get the rights back to their books but those are a few options. If you’re unagented, then you should get a literary lawyer to go through your contract before you sign. Some things are negotiable!
If you have time I would like you to check out the first 3 chapters of my Christian Romance Novel I just completed.
Sorry, but I didn’t open your attachment and I don’t endorse or read work by others. I judge contests that’re hosted by different writing organizations every year, and that’s my way of giving useful feedback to others. If you want an honest review of your work, I’d suggest joining a writers group and a critique group. There are a number of critique groups online and by exchanging work with others, you might be able to improve your craft while helping others do the same. The first few critique groups that I was in were found through writers’ organizations. But, be warned, sometimes writers get their feelings hurt while being critiqued, also, it might take you awhile to find a group or partner that’s a good fit for you. If you want to know more about my policy on endorsements and reading work by others, you’ll find it on my website.
Oh and another thing can you add sex and making love in a Christian Romance? Some people have a problem with that.
Probably not. Most Christian fiction has no love scenes or sex scenes. Do you know which publisher you’re targeting? If you do, then read a ton of books that are published by the line/publisher to which you want to submit. Once it’s time to submit, you’ll have a good idea about the types of books that this publisher/line/imprint publishes! If people do have sex in a novel that most consider Christian, the door is usually closed. Also, if people have sex outside of marriage, and the book is Christian, there are usually consequences involved with having sex outside of matrimony.
I’d like to add that, I have seen books that use the church, and church-related business as the setting, and there are sex scenes in those books. However, it’s often been debated if those books are considered Christian fiction or Christian fRiction? Retailers will sometimes place books with a church setting in the Christian fiction section, and then readers will claim that those books couldn’t be Christian because of the sex and profanity in the novels. I’ve heard that those books are termed as Christian fRiction instead of fiction? This is just what I’ve heard, I have nothing to back this up. I’ve heard writers talk about this at writers conferences.
Hope that answers your questions Lashonda! I’m glad you e-mailed me those questions!
Samson By Jacquelin Thomas
Samson by Jacquelin Thomas
Samson Taylor has just been installed as assistant pastor at a thriving North Carolina church. He’s a man of God—and most definitely no saint. Handsome and charismatic, Samson is controlled by his lust for beautiful women, a weakness that stirs up trouble, heartache, betrayal, and damaging rumors—and soon costs him his marriage, his best friendship, and even his new job. Samson loves God and tries harder than ever to keep his temptations in check. Then he meets Delinda. . . .Beautiful, irresistibly sexy, and married to a famous NBA star, Delinda has Samson head-over-heels in love . . . in a dangerous affair that leads to a physical confrontation with Delinda’s husband.Now, the disgraced pastor begins a journey he could never have anticipated, where his heart is now his guide—not a heart of lust, but of new wisdom and a new kind of seeing. God will forgive Samson’s past—but will Samson himself be able to let go of bitterness and regret, and find a new light in his life?Inspired by the Biblical tale of Samson and Delilah, Jacquelin Thomas powerfully portrays a modern-day pastor’s dance with earthly desires . . . and the faith that made him whole.
In yesterday’s blog post, I asked what would it be like if Samson from the Old Testament were living today. What kind of life would he be living? Well, if you want to know the answer to that question, read Jacquelin Thomas’s book Samson! This book gives a vivid portrayal of the life of Samson, a pastor who lusts after women, and he also marries a Buddist – a strict no-no for Christians since we’re not supposed to be unequally yoked with non-believers. After marrying his Buddist wife, his life continues on the path of lustful destruction that causes him great physical pain and disability. If you want to read about a modern-day Samson, then this book is for you!
Jacquelin Thomas has also answered the following questions:
Were there challenges in turning to Biblical fiction for you?
J.T.: Not really. I made the decision and I did it because I knew this is what God required of me.
Why Samson?
J.T.: “Samson was inspired by the Biblical tale of Samson and Delilah. I’ve always been interested in this particular story, and often wondered why Samson couldn’t see what Delilah was up to–how could he not know that she would be his ruin? It was these questions that prompted me to write this story.”
The story of Samson and Delilah is one of the most popular in the Bible. Did you find yourself having an ‘ah ha’ moment during research for your story?
J.T.: “Mostly for me, I had a hard time understanding why Samson continued to deal with Delilah as she had betrayed him on more than one occasion. I liked most that although he loved God, he was still a flawed man–I could relate because I strive to do right each and every day, but there are times when I fall. However, this shows the depth of God’s love for us, even when we disappoint Him.”
When Samson and Savannah play scrabble you included some Hebrew words, was there a point to that?
J.T.: “Not really–at my church, we are learning Hebrew and so it was my way of retaining what I learned.”
What do you hope to accomplish through this particular topic?
J.T.: “Despite Samson’s earthly desires and the tragedy that befell him–I want readers to understand that it was his faith and his love for the Lord that made him whole. We are nothing without God and sometimes it takes something terrible to happen to us before we come to this realization.
How can readers keep up with you online?
J.T.: You can reach me at the following:
Facebook/www.facebook.com/jacquelin.thomas,
Twitter — @jacquelinthomas
Email — jacquelinthomas@yahoo.com
Thanks so much for being on my blog today! I’ve enjoyed this discussion about your new release, and I pray that you’ll continue to write Biblical and entertaining stories!
Here are the stops for the blog tour! Visit these blogs to find out more about this powerful story:
Monday, June 7th
Linda Beed http://letusbearfruit.blogspot.com
Maurice Gray http://www.mauricemgrayjr.com/
Tuesday, June 8th
Patricia Woodside http://readinnwritin.blogspot.com
Cecelia Dowdy http://ceceliadowdy.blogspot.com/
Paulette Harper http://pauletteharper.blogspot.com/
Wednesday, June 9th
Gregory Turner http://www.blogtalkadio.com/asemotivation
Call in: (718) 508-9600
6P/PST-8P/CST-9P/EST
Wanda Campbell http://www.wandabcampbell.net/blog.html
Tia McCollors http://tiaspen.blogspot.com/
Thursday, June 10th
Carla Nix http://www.blogtalkradio.com/passion4life
Call in: (646) 652-2527
5P/PST – 7P/CST – 8P/EST
Jill Elizabeth Nelson http://www.jillelizabethnelson.com/artisticblogger.html
Jeanette Hill/Sharel Love http://www.sasprod.org/
Friday, June 11th
Alvin Romer Live Tele-book Party 6P/PST – 8P/CST – 9PEST w/LaShaunda Hoffman and friends Call in: 605 475-4700 Access: 176632#
Samson!
What do you think Samson’s life would’ve been like if he’d been born during modern times?
Read Judges – Chapters 13-16 to get the full Old Testament account of Samson’s life.
Samson was a strong man who battled with his lust for women. He even married a Philistine woman – someone who was not of his faith. He was strong and mighty, killing a lion with his bare hands and killing a thousand Philistines with the jawbone of a donkey.
He hooked up with a Philistine harlot, Delilah, and because of his lust, his common sense escaped him. Delilah grilled him about his source of strength until his defenses broke down and he told his secret – no razor had ever come upon his head and his strength came from his seven locks of hair.
The secret was out and Samson paid the price for the mistake he made because of his lustful weakness. He was mocked, blinded and imprisoned by the Philistines. When his hair began to grow back, he asked God for strength, and then he pushed the two pillars with all his might, bringing the temple down, killing the crowd, as well as himself…
Judges 16:28-30
28 Then Samson called to the LORD, saying, “O Lord GOD, remember me, I pray! Strengthen me, I pray, just this once, O God, that I may with one blow take vengeance on the Philistines for my two eyes!” 29 And Samson took hold of the two middle pillars which supported the temple, and he braced himself against them, one on his right and the other on his left. 30 Then Samson said, “Let me die with the Philistines!” And he pushed with all his might, and the temple fell on the lords and all the people who were in it. So the dead that he killed at his death were more than he had killed in his life.
What do you think Samson’s life would’ve been like if he’d been born during modern times? Read tomorrow’s blog entry to find out more about a very interesting book that’ll answer that question!
Blog Break!
I’m taking a blogging break for the rest of the month. I’ve got a proposal that I’m trying to finish. Hopefully, I can have it out the door by June.
Would You Fall Down And Worship The Image?

Daniel 3:15-18
15 Now if you are ready at the time you hear the sound of the horn, flute, harp, lyre, and psaltery, in symphony with all kinds of music, and you fall down and worship the image which I have made, good! But if you do not worship, you shall be cast immediately into the midst of a burning fiery furnace. And who is the god who will deliver you from my hands?”
16 Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego answered and said to the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. 17 If that is the case, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and He will deliver us from your hand, O king. 18 But if not, let it be known to you, O king, that we do not serve your gods, nor will we worship the gold image which you have set up.”
Remember in the book of Daniel when Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-Nego refused to worship Nebuchadnezzar’s gold image and as a result, they were thrown in the fiery furnace. Nebuchadnezzar even had the furnace burning seven times hotter, he was so angry. It was so hot that some of the king’s men were killed by the flames when they escorted Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-Nego to the furnace. But, God protected them, and as a result, Nebuchadnezzar promoted the threesome.
Do you think you if you’d been placed in that position that you would’ve bowed down to the golden image, or would you have had faith that God would’ve protected you from the fire? How deep would your faith have been?
That’s a tough question to answer. I know we need to love and trust God, but when faced with the fiery furnace of death, versus bowing down to a false idol, we know what we should do, but do have have enough faith in God to actually do what we’re supposed to do? Do you think you would’ve bowed down to the image, begging God for forgiveness later?
Let Us Bear Fruit! :-)
Chesapeake Weddings is being featured on the Let Us Bear Fruit blog! I also encourage you to scroll through some of the other posts on Let Us Bear Fruit. Dr. Linda Beed posts insightful things about writing, and she encourages other authors.
Tired And Blocked! :-(
I’m working on a novel now and my mind is blocked…I guess it’s writer’s block. Any suggestions that may help unlock my mind?
Also, I read two really great books recently, but I’m too tired to post about them: A Passion Redeemed by Julie Lessman and Only Uni by Camy Tang. I will post full reviews for both of these soon, but I just don’t have the energy to do that right now. I did enjoy both books, especially Julie’s! Julie’s books are always a joy to read and I understand she has a new series coming in September!
I have a self-imposed deadline to have this book in proposal format by the end of the month. I know it’s weird to say this, but, it’s kind of a blessing that this book is not under contract…if it were, then the pressure of unblocking my mind and getting it done would increase…ten-fold!!
I have a couple of other books that I was supposed to read and review for this blog. I’ve already contacted those authors, letting them know that reading their novels and reviewing their books will have to be placed on hold for awhile until I can complete this project.
Finding Jeena By Miralee Ferrell
I have not read this entire book yet…but I did read a few pages at the chiropractor’s office last night and it looks like a good book! I’ll probably be posting a review sometime within the next month!
~Cecelia Dowdy~
It is time for a FIRST Wild Card Tour book review! If you wish to join the FIRST blog alliance, just click the button. We are a group of reviewers who tour Christian books. A Wild Card post includes a brief bio of the author and a full chapter from each book toured. The reason it is called a FIRST Wild Card Tour is that you never know if the book will be fiction, non~fiction, for young, or for old…or for somewhere in between! Enjoy your free peek into the book!
You never know when I might play a wild card on you!
and the book:
Kregel Publications (March 8, 2010)
***Special thanks to Cat Hoort of Kregel Publications for sending me a review copy.***

Miralee Ferrell and her husband, Allen, live in a rural community in Washington State. She serves on staff at their local church as a licensed minister and is actively involved in ministry to women, as well as speaking to women’s groups. She’s always been an avid reader and dabbled in writing, but never considered it as a serious calling until 2005 when she felt the Lord directing her to write. Since then she’s had several magazine articles published, two in book compilations, and four full-length novels released with a fifth releasing in early 2011. Miralee loves working in her flower beds, riding horseback with her daughter, and sailing with her husband.
Visit the author’s website.
Product Details:
List Price: $13.99
Paperback: 304 pages
Publisher: Kregel Publications (March 8, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0825426456
ISBN-13: 978-0825426452
AND NOW…THE FIRST CHAPTER:
She refused to let fear or insecurity take control. Fear couldn’t hurt her—only men could do that. And Sean loved her.
No way would she believe the rumor she’d heard from Connie, the biggest gossip in her small group of friends. Sean couldn’t be seeing someone else. He was close to proposing; she’d sensed it more than once. Jeena shook her head, trying to dislodge the disquieting thoughts. He’d have a good explanation.
Her confidence level soared after applying makeup and slipping into the dress. It had cost her two days’ salary, but it was worth every cent. Hugging her in all the right places, the dark red silk accented her long black hair and green eyes. Working out at the club kept her figure where she wanted it.
Sean’s car flashed past Jeena’s window and halted in front of her small condo. Jeena ran a hand over her trim hips. She’d be thirty later this year, and her body still looked like that of a twenty-year-old—she’d maintain it if she had to work out every day.
The doorbell chimed, but this time Jeena didn’t rush to answer. Sean Matthews needn’t think her life revolved around his arrival, even if it did. Playing a little hard to get might work in her favor.
The bell chimed a second time, and Jeena imagined its tone changed to one of impatience. Better not overdo it. She opened the door and stepped back into the glow of the entry light to give him the full effect.
A small frown turned down the corners of Sean’s mouth, giving a serious aspect to his rugged face. His tapping toe stilled, but his lowered brows didn’t lift until he stepped across the threshold.
The smile Jeena expected didn’t appear. Apprehension flickered through her mind. “Something wrong, Sean?” She touched his arm.
He ran his fingers through his dark blond hair, giving a slightly rumpled look to a man who prided himself on his appearance. “Our reservation is in fifteen minutes. We’re going to be late.”
He hadn’t seemed to notice the gown or the accentuated curves. “I had a bit of a struggle zipping up this dress.”
“You might need a jacket. That looks a little skimpy for a chilly evening.”
The small wisp of fear grew, fanned by the coolness of his impatience.
“Skimpy? That’s it?” She stepped back, folding her arms.
He shot a quick, cool look at the dress. “You look great. Is it new?”
She pursed her lips. Something was up. “Yes, it’s new.” She swung toward the closet. “Fine. I’ll get a jacket.” She yanked open the door and pulled a black cape off the rack. Great start to our evening.
He helped her into his silver Lexus, then slipped into his seat and turned the key. “You really do look stunning.” Sean paused. “It’s been a crazy day, and I’ve had a lot on my mind.” He gave her a soft smile before turning his attention back to the road.
They pulled out into the street and headed through the residential area toward the edge of town. Silhouetted against the skyline, tall fir trees flanked the elegant homes along the way. Kids still played in front yards, and a couple of eager homeowners mowed their yards. Jeena sighed. She missed having a yard and flowerbeds. The new townhouse she’d put a deposit on boasted a small backyard and window boxes in the front, so she could indulge her gardening hobby on her days off.
She sank deeper in the seat and released a small breath. Peaceful silence enveloped her as the quiet car snaked around the curves and the sun glinted off the nearby Columbia River. Sean loved her. Losing sight of that was foolish. Sure, he’d neglected to kiss her when he’d arrived, but she understood the stress generated by work. His job as a financial consultant to a large corporation in Portland often kept him distracted.
Connie was being catty and nothing more.
Jeena gave a low laugh. “You had me worried. I thought aliens had taken over your body when you didn’t react to this dress.”
He pulled away from a stop sign and glanced in his mirror, then reached over and took her hand. “Never fear. If aliens attempt a takeover, I’ll shoot ’em dead.” His quick smile flashed. “Hungry?”
“Very.” She’d been foolish to listen to Connie. An hour earlier, she couldn’t have eaten a thing, but now she was ravenous.
Sean had chosen a small, rather exclusive restaurant, a rarity in River City, Oregon. They could have driven an hour up I-84 to Portland, but the recent growth of tourism in the Columbia River Gorge had birthed new hot spots, popular with locals and tourists alike.
They were seated by a window that afforded a breathtaking view of the river, and Jeena could see the colorful sails of windsurfers kiting along in the evening breeze, the soft glow of the late April sunset bronzing the multi-colored sails. Candles glowed against the damask tablecloth, giving off a subtle air of luxury. Strains of low music added to the ambiance, creating a soothing background for the trickle of diners still drifting in.
Sean had requested a quiet spot in the corner, giving a sense of privacy that still allowed a good view. While he ordered, Jeena glanced around the room, wondering if any of their friends might be here tonight. No familiar faces appeared within her line of sight. Good. She wanted this evening to be theirs alone. Maybe they could sort out the nasty rumor starting to circulate and kill it before it morphed into something worse.
Sean leaned back in his seat and sighed, stretching his legs out from under the heavy brocade cloth.
“Long day?” Jeena reached across to stroke the side of his face. He didn’t pull away, but he didn’t wrap his long fingers around hers as she’d expected. A small alarm went off in the back of her mind.
He gave a small shake of his head, dislodging her hand. “Not really. It feels good to sit across the table from a beautiful woman, instead of looking at bored businessmen all day.”
She sat back in her chair and relaxed. “Something going on at work that’s bothering you?”
“Very little. How about you? When does your lease start on the new townhouse?”
“In ten days, so I’m boxing everything up now. I’ve got my final interview a week from Monday with Browning and Thayer.”
“It’s too bad it’s only a temporary job, but with your expertise in design, they can’t go wrong contracting you.” He straightened in his chair and leaned toward her, an affectionate smile flickering across his lips.
She flashed him a grateful look. “Thanks. I hope they feel the same. But being a private contractor has its advantages, and the project is big—it should last at least a year.”
The waiter arrived, placing steaming plates of fragrant pasta in front of them and gathering the empty salad dishes. A few minutes passed in comfortable silence, and Jeena’s misgivings evaporated in the relaxed intimacy.
Candlelight cast a warm light across Sean’s face, accentuating his masculine good looks. Jeena smiled and settled deeper into her chair. “So tell me about your family. Last time we talked, you were concerned about your mom living alone, now that your dad’s gone. How’s she doing?”
“Great, from what I gather when I have time to call.” He wound the last strand of pasta onto his fork and took a bite, then wiped his mouth with a napkin. “I’m sorry—I see a client I need to speak to. I’ll only be a minute. Do you mind?” He nodded across the room to a silver-haired man sitting with an elegantly dressed woman.
“Not at all.” She smiled, then watched him make his way through the tables.
She’d first spotted him at a party a little over a year ago. Tall, mid-thirties, dressed in an Italian three-piece suit, and built like a model, he stood out in the crowd of older businessmen. An air of sophistication clung to him, enhanced by vivid blue eyes set in a deeply tanned face. A striking blonde who’d had too much to drink was hanging on his arm. He looked slightly disgusted and appeared to be searching for an escape.
Setting aside her drink, Jeena strolled across the room, knowing she’d captured his attention even before she approached.
She extended her hand and smiled when he held it longer than necessary. “I don’t think we’ve been introduced. I’m Jeena Gregory, a friend of our hostess.”
“Sean Matthews. This is . . . I’m sorry, what’s your name again?” His bored gaze turned to the blonde.
The woman released her grip on his arm and glared at Jeena. “Angie.”
Sean cocked his head toward the woman. “Right. Sorry. This is Angie.”
Angie’s lips turned down in a pout. “I’m getting something to drink. I’ll find someone more interesting to take me home.” Angie flounced across the room without looking back.
Sean’s blue eyes shone with something more than amusement. “I didn’t bring her, but she’s had too much to drink and must have forgotten. She latched onto me when I arrived. Thanks for the rescue.”
Jeena spent the rest of the evening in his company—and many evenings after that. Within a few weeks, she knew she wanted to spend the rest of her life with this man. Intelligent, witty, generous, and advancing up the corporate ladder at a fast pace, he possessed much that she found attractive.
Sean, however, remained an enigma. While engaging and attentive, he had yet to commit to a permanent relationship. Jeena sensed his frustration at her adamant refusal to move in together. She enjoyed the party life and didn’t judge others for their lifestyle choices, but she drew the line at moving in with a man before marriage. She deserved more. Besides, too many of her crowd had gone that direction, and she’d seen disaster strike more than once.
“Jeena? I’m sorry I took so long. I hope you weren’t bored.” Sean’s deep voice woke her from the memories.
She brushed the hair from her eyes. “Not at all. Just remembering our first meeting.”
“Ah, yes. The party.”
Jeena tried to suppress a smile but failed. “And poor Angie.”
Sean laughed outright. “Poor Angie, nothing. That woman clung like a leech with no encouragement from me. You came along just in time.”
She leaned toward him and stroked the back of his hand. “Did I?”
He slowly pulled back, and the smile disappeared.
“What’s wrong?” Her heart rate accelerated.
He cleared his throat and picked up a napkin. “There’s something I want to tell you.”
Tell. Not ask. Jeena leaned back and crossed her arms. “Yes?”
“I’ve been offered a new job. It means a huge increase in pay and could lead to a partnership.”
“That sounds wonderful. I didn’t realize you were looking.”
“I didn’t mention it until I knew something would come of it. I didn’t want to worry you.”
“Why would I care?” Her palms grew clammy, but she refused to give in to fear.
His lips set in a firm line; then he took a deep breath and plunged forward. “It’s taking me out of the States. A large construction conglomerate wants me in the Middle East.”
A small shiver of fear traveled up her back. “But that’s dangerous. Tell me you’re not going to take it.”
“I’ve said yes. I’ll be living in Kuwait and going across the border occasionally, and then only to areas that are deemed safe. I leave in two weeks.”
“Two weeks,” she whispered. “What about us?”
He shifted in his chair and looked at his hands, then raised his eyes. “I’m sorry, Jeena.”
“What do you mean, you’re sorry? You’re not asking me to come with you or wait? How long will you be gone?” She tried to keep the pain out of her voice, but her words rose in tone and volume.
An irritated look flashed across his face. The small, secluded spot he’d chosen closed in around her. No longer did the flickering candles on the table give off an aura of romance—instead, they gleamed with an ominous light.
“I’ll be gone at least a year, maybe two. You didn’t want to live with me here in the States, so I didn’t think you’d be willing to move to Kuwait.” Sean leaned back in his chair, holding her gaze.
She’d probably hold onto him if she gave in, but something inside protested. Her parents’ marriage had been lousy, no doubt about that. But her mother had saved herself for the man she married and had often urged Jeena to do the same. Besides, Grammie would be be horrified if Jeena made that decision. A deep love for both her mother and grandmother had prompted Jeena to walk the same path.
“But if we were married . . .” She could have bitten off her tongue for letting the words slip.
Sean’s lips twisted in a wry smile. “I have no desire to get married.”
“So all of this has been what . . . a game? You aren’t in love with me? Never have been?”
He shrugged. “I think a lot of you. But marriage isn’t part of my plan. I thought we’d have a good time. Frankly, I hung around hoping you’d change your mind.”
“You knew how I felt about living together. It’s not something I’m comfortable with.”
Sean smirked. “You told me your dad was a religious Jekyll and Hyde and you had no use for God. I never expected you’d stick with your decision and be such a prude.”
His words brought the chaos in her mind to a halt. An icy calm washed over her. “Prude. I see. So, who is she?”
His face flamed red, then faded to a dirty white. “Who?”
She rose quickly, her chair sliding into the waiter who was walking behind her. Pride stiffened her spine and held her head high. “I nailed that one. Never mind. I’m sure you’ll be very happy together, and my prudish life will be better off without you.”
She slipped around the table and started to walk past him, but he reached out and grasped her wrist. “Jeena. Don’t be that way. I’ll drive you home. I’m sorry.”
Shaking off his hand, she stepped out of his reach and lowered her voice, conscious of the curious looks from the tables nearby. “I’ll get a taxi. Have a great life, Sean.”
Somehow she managed to exit the restaurant without calling more attention to herself. Humiliation at making a scene while leaving the table forced her to increase her pace and not look back. The poor waiter—she’d nearly bowled him over while rushing from the table. But no way could she allow Sean to see her cry. She needed to get home and face this. The tears would come later, and no telling when they’d stop.
Men. Anger bubbled inside, momentarily pushing aside the sting of tears. Her father had proven men couldn’t be trusted—he hadn’t loved her, either. Why had she forgotten? Never again would a man suck her in with promises and lies. From now on, her career would come first. She’d show them all. The only person in the world who mattered was her grandmother. She’d neglected her recently, but tomorrow was a new day. Grammie would be happy to see her, and Sean was no longer important.
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY! :-)
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