***Note that this is a non-fiction title. I haven’t talked about a non-fiction title on my blog in a long time.
I’m Perfect, You’re Doomed – Tales from a Jehovah’s Witness Upbringing by Kyria Abrahams
From Amazon.com:
Editorial Reviews
From Booklist
*Starred Review* Given that Abrahams is now a stand-up comic and spoken-word poet, it makes perfect sense to begin her very funny memoir with her performance debut at the Pawtucket, Rhode Island, Kingdom Hall, at age 8 (her presentation was about freedom from demon possession). She describes the children’s books she read as a child as a cross between “Dr. Seuss rhymes and tales of how sinners would scream and gnash their teeth at Armageddon.” In her world, Smurfs were “little blue demons” and yard sales were enticements from Satan. As a bored teenager with OCD, she didn’t know what to do with herself or how to make sense of the world. On the verge of 18, she married a 24-year-old part-time college math teacher because, even if his interest in her was, at best, halfhearted, she wanted a boyfriend and didn’t know any other Jehovah’s Witnesses who liked her. Anyway, she reasons, “this is what adults did, and I was an adult.” It wasn’t long before she longed to be out of the marriage. Between threats of suicide, she tried to be “disfellowshipped,” or shunned, by her congregation, which proved surprisingly difficult to accomplish. Abrahams is a natural writer whose prose flows effortlessly as she easily mixes throwaway humor and painful memories in a compelling narrative. –June Sawyers
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I spent a great deal of my Memorial Day weekend reading this book. I purchased it about a month ago, but due to other reading commitments, just got around to reading it last Saturday.
Kyria was raised in The Truth (this is what the Jehovah’s Witnesses call their religion). She became active in the Theocratic Ministry School (when JW’s give skits about preaching door to door and “witnessing” to others) when she was eight, and continued to be active in the religion until her early twenties.
During the course of her life, she had a lot of issues to deal with. Her parents were unhappily married, and half of the time her father did not work. Wanting to escape her unhappy homelife, she quits school at seventeen and marries another JW who’s in his mid-twenties. She doesn’t love this man, but no longer wants to remain living at home.
As she struggles with OCD, alcoholism, and self-mutilation (cutting herself) Kyria realizes that The Truth is not working for her and takes steps to leave the controlling religion.
It’s hard to talk about all that happened in this book without giving away spoilers. Overall, the book was funny while talking about seriously depressing issues, giving the story a bittersweet tone.
Kyria also has a humorous glossary in the back with various JW terms. I didn’t notice the glossary until I was almost finished with the book, but didn’t really need to refer to it since I was already familiar with most JW terms.
While reading this book, I felt like I was taking a step back in time. I was raised a JW until I was twelve – when I was abruptly stopped from going to the Kingdom Hall(this is what JWs call their church). While away at college, I hooked up with JWs again, still erroneously thinking they were the “true religion.”
I became a Christian after college, while still in my twenties, after discovering all sorts of things about JWs that I did not like – too many things to discuss within this blog post.
Anyway, Kyria’s book depicts the life of JWs very realistically. The details and descriptions of the meetings, the Kingdom Hall, the programs, going out in service, and the terminology is accurate. If you want to really know what it’s like on the inside, being a JW, then this book will give you an accurate picture of life in The Truth.
However, if you read this book, you’ll have to remember that Kyria had a lot of problems with her OCD, alcoholism, and self-mutilation. Although being a JW certainly contributed to her problems, I felt that she still would have led an extremely troubled life even if she were Catholic, Baptist, or any other religion. I didn’t think that JW’s caused ALL of her problems, but, she did make some crazy decisions that she probably would not have made if she hadn’t been a JW.
I could really relate to her experiences with education. Her husband is a college professor, a job the congregation frowns upon since JWs don’t advocate higher eduation. They don’t see the benefit of preparing you to take care of yourself financially for the future…because there is no future…Jesus will be here any day now and we must preach the good word and not worry about going to college and getting a good job to support ourselves!
However, I’ve heard their views on education have changed in recent years.
I thought the book ended rather abruptly. It appears that the author never finds another religion. She doesn’t talk about becoming a Christian, so the reader is left unsure about Kyria’s religious beliefs. You’re kind of left hanging about what happens next.
Oh, just wanted to end this blog post by stating this: If you’re an active JW, don’t think The Society has the power to decide your salvation…they don’t. Read the Bible (NOT THE NEW WORLD TRANSLATION) for yourself, ask lots of questions, and think about the Word independently of the Watchtower and Awake.
~Cecelia Dowdy~
